Try to convey more in stage directions than is physically possible



SUSAN: (PERSPICUOUSLY) I wonder where Alan could have got to?

NIGEL: (LUCIDLY) Oh, I wouldn’t worry about him if I were you.

ENTER ALAN, WHO HAS JUST UNDERGONE A PROFOUNDLY MOVING RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE, CAUSING HIM TO SEE THE NATURE OF THE UNIVERSE UNFILTERED BY EMOTION OR DESIRE.

ALAN: Hi.

SUSAN: (INCONGRUOUSLY) Alan! There you are!

NIGEL: (SUBTLY INQUISITIVE, YET MAINTAINING AN AIR OF EXAMINED SANGFROID) Hi Alan.

ALAN BRIEFY CONSIDERS HOW BEST TO SHARE HIS NEWFOUND CLARITY OF PURPOSE WITH HIS FRIENDS, BEFORE REACHING THE CONCLUSION THAT THEY MUST EACH FOLLOW THEIR OWN PATH AND SEEK THEIR OWN TRUTH.

ALAN: Hi.


12 comments:

  1. This speaks to my soul.

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  2. haha I love the last part with Alan

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  3. From Sheridan's The Critic (Lord Burleigh is a character in the play being rehearsed, Sneer is a drama critic, and Puff is the director):

    LORD BURLEIGH comes forward, shakes his head, and exit.
    Sneer. He is very perfect indeed! Now, pray what did he mean by that?
    Puff. You don't take it?
    Sneer. No, I don't, upon my soul.
    Puff. Why, by that shake of the head, he gave you to understand that even though they had more justice in their cause, and wisdom in their measures--yet, if there was not a greater spirit shown on the part of the people, the country would at last fall a sacrifice to the hostile ambition of the Spanish monarchy.
    Sneer. The devil! did he mean all that by shaking his head?
    Puff. Every word of it--if he shook his head as I taught him.

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  4. From Heiner Muller's Hamletmachine:

    Enter OPHELIA. Her heart is a clock.

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  5. Real. Yes. Perfect.

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  6. Anne: (WITH A MIXTURE OF GREAT AMUSEMENT AT THE BLOG POST AND AWE AT FOR THE AUTHOR'S TALENT) Hi.
    ANNE CONTEMPLATES HER HOMEWORK, AND REACHES THE CONCLUSION THAT SHE MUST GO AND FINISH IT PROMPTLY.
    Anne: Bye.

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