Craft ambiguous similes


Susan stepped out into the busy road like a country lane, causing traffic to screech to a halt like nails on a blackboard. She stood for a moment, letting the wind whistle past her like a wind chime and the silence fill her ears like shells.
‘Get out of the road!’ yelled an obese taxi driver like a sack of blubber. Susan paid him no attention. She was calm, not letting her thoughts turn to panic, like a still pond.
‘It’s okay,’ she said, feeling as unflappable, placid and content as a dead bird’s wing. The taxi driver’s eyes widened like a child at Christmas.
‘Out of the road!’ he repeated, his voice a furious scream, like a stuck record.

14 comments:

  1. noting down the 'ambiguous similes' like an experienced stenographer.

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  2. This is a lot like some Wikipedia articles I've read. Bravo.

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  3. Totally worth the wait, Joel.

    "...like a dead birds wing."

    I could barely contain myself like a sweater that doesn't fit.

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  4. I hate you for coming up with this idea and being consistently awesome and funny about it. Basically I hate you because I want to be you.

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  5. In my own writing, I avoid similes like they were a plague of armless mimes.

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  6. there's nothing else like this online, like nothing else online.

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  7. pretty sure i just read a book written close to this. that was fun...

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  8. Well said, like a bird's wing.

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  9. I personally enjoy crafting similes and metaphors alike, but refrain from doing so in each and every line. don't you think it bores the reader a bit???
    Great blog anyway,sir!!

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  10. I'm finding this blog to be very effective, like the Kyoto Protocols.

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  11. oh gawd, that sounds like me! But I did not mean it as a parody! I shall shoot myself and get a day job, not sure in what order. Thank you for the wake-up call.

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