Fighting for breath, Britney Bin Laden sprinted away from the collapsing building with all the speed of a get rich quick scheme or celebrity nipple slip. A massive explosion tore seductively through the virgin wall behind her, a wall which was eighteen years old and ready for fun.
Yikes, thought Britney, this is certainly exclusive breaking news which might well affect current stock prices. Just then, a truck carrying cheap pharmaceutical goods veered off the road, narrowly missing her. That could have killed me, thought Britney, her life flashing before her eyes like a free bootleg movie download. There are so many things I regret. I wish I had won top prizes at an online Euro-Casino, or talked to more singles in my area.
‘Britney!’ someone shouted. She squinted through the smoke. It was her friend and lover, Jesus Michael Jackson-Obama-Sextape. ‘Are you okay?’ he said, offering her coupon codes for genuine software downloads.
You should have named it "14 Ways To Improve..." etc instead.
ReplyDeleteBy the way I wouldn't be surprised if Googlebot believes this post to be spam and moves you to page 639.
Britney Bin Laden.
ReplyDeleteNow why didn't I think of that?
:-)
Yes it's all in a name!
ReplyDeleteone of my new favorites :)
ReplyDelete"Jesus Michael Jackson-Obama-Sextape" - wtf ?
ReplyDeleteI vaguely recall someone doing this -- they took the top 100 (or something) search terms and made a story out of it. I tried looking for it but of course it's completely un-Google-able. :-(
ReplyDeleteI think we may have a new genre: Search term fiction! I wonder if that site is taken
ReplyDeleteApplies mostly to online writing... blogs for example. ;)
ReplyDeleteone of the best for a while. da iawn, bach.
ReplyDeleteVery funny.
ReplyDeleteSearch term fiction. I feel a disturbing new trend coming on...
ReplyDeleteFor a tired mum of three who spends most of her day pretending to laugh at fart jokes, your posts are like a good bottle of wine, a hand-made box of chocolates and a gloriously sexy French stranger looking for directions all rolled into one.
ReplyDeleteI had tears in my eyes reading this. Brilliant!
ReplyDeleteI think I've gotten spam that looks like this.
ReplyDeletePfft, I've had that text-enhance thing on my computer for a little while (I'm too lazy to go to the site and take it off) and like the whole thing was links XD
ReplyDeleteThis post is so funny it makes me want to speed up my computer and get rid of acne.
ReplyDelete123คาสิโน หรือ 123casino อันดับ 1 คาสิโนออนไลน์ ได้เงินจริงของไทย สุดยอดเว็บพนันออนไลน์ที่มั่นคงที่สุดด้านการเงิน ฝาก-ถอน อัติโนมัติ
ReplyDelete