Rely on your back catalogue #2

(if this doesn’t make sense to you, see the previous post)



IN THE EVENT OF FIRE

  • When you hear the alarm, calmly make your way to the nearest exit.
  • If the nearest exit is on fire, consult the emergency floor-plan for an alternative escape route.
  • If the emergency floor-plan is on fire, report to your building’s safety officer.
  • In the event that your building’s safety officer is also on fire, dial 999 on the nearest phone and ask for the fire brigade.
  • It is entirely possible that the nearest phone is, like everything else in the office, on fire. If this is the case, use your mobile – 999 calls are free on all networks, so you won’t even have to fill in an expenses claim form.
  • If your mobile phone is on fire, you’re starting to run out of options. You could try shouting for help out of a window.
  • By this point, you’re probably on fire yourself. Your situation now is beyond the remit of this poster. Good luck.

6 comments:

  1. * If 999 does not work, try 112, 911, 000, 100, 119, 110, or 111.

    (112 is the worldwide emergency number for all GSM mobiles, and actually works in any EU country, including the U.K., from any phone. The others are for the U.S. and Canada; Australia; India and Israel; Jamaica, South Korea, Japan, China, and Sri Lanka; Iran and Germany; and New Zealand respectively. There are many more, but that should be quite enough to be confusing.)

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    1. 110 is actually only for police in Germany. For fire and medical emergencies you need to dial 112. But because of all the American shows on TV, they've now added 911 to the emergency numbers. Globalization is weeeiiiird...

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    2. 110 is actually only for police in Germany. For fire and medical emergencies you need to dial 112. But because of all the American shows on TV, they've now added 911 to the emergency numbers. Globalization is weeeiiiird...

      Delete
  2. Or, as in any school, when fire alarm sounds, take time packing up bags because "everyone knows it's fake!" Until the day it isn't ;)

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  3. But what if the poster was on fire?

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    Replies
    1. Perhaps the poster is made of fireproof material. Which, all things considered, could have been put to better use elsewhere.

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